The “secret” to a great marriage?

Secret- So I was perusing my blog feed reader the other day when I came across a compelling blog post title by The Dating Divas.

(Yes, I subscribe to the Dating Divas RSS feed! I am also a proud member of the Happy Wives Club even though my wife isn't… yet.)

50+ Secrets of a Great Marriage, the title read.

Like any terrible husband that title intrigued me.

Naturally, I clicked over.


50+ wives married anywhere from 1 to 60 years each sharing a nugget of wisdom about how to have a great marriage.

I like nuggets.

And wisdom.

There are some great insights into love and marriage over there, including a few that made me think, or laugh, like:

When in a fight get naked. You can’t be mad at someone naked 😉 {Marissa, married 3 years}

[Ha! Cute.]*

*DISCLAIMER: Do not try this when arguing with buddies, in a work meeting, or if you're arguing on bluetooth on the ride home, as the results will likely range from “ineffective” to “felonious.”

If you have kids or struggle avoiding arguments in public, you might agree to only fight naked. That would force you to either save your discussion for when you're home alone or get arrested for indecent exposure…

Hint: Choose home alone.

Learn to keep your mouth shut sometimes 😛 {Tiffany, married 6 years}

[Yep. Sometimes the best thing to say is nothing.]

Choose to love your spouse each and every day. And then show them that love. Don’t assume they know you love them. {Bill and Jenn, married 17 years}

[Read that last sentence twice.]

And, finally:

Be nice to each other! It’s shocking how many people forget that.” {Dana, married 28 years}

[That last one pretty much checks all the boxes. Simple and flexible.]

Pretty cool stuff.

Dana gets it. I imagine her husband gets it. It works in all contexts.

Argument? OK to disagree, but be nice.

Bringing up something that might be difficult to talk about? Be nice.

Tired? It's OK to ask for help or a break, but be nice, not entitled.

And, really, what's the alternative? Like… how are you going to argue the opposite of “be nice to each other” being an effective way to live?

I've been reading everything I can get my hands on about marriage, love, relationships, manhood, and parenting over the last year or so.

I'll continue to share lessons, resources, ideas, and other things that impact me in my efforts to lead a movement of people who commit to stop pointing fingers and start taking personal responsibility over improving their relationships. I've shared several books with you over the last years. I'll continue to do that. But I will also be sure to include more blogs and other resources that have impacted me, like today!

There's some good stuff happening over at the Dating Divas site. Over 50 Secrets to a Great Marriage. I'm sure you'll love it.

Be sure to check it out and share your favorite from their list in the comments.

Or add your own!

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.